you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
