There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
