Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
