Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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