p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
