"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Sober January is a disaster.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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