Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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