Texts From Last Night

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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.

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  (515): Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs. (402): but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs. http://tfl.nu/7170
  Replies (9) Good night (3759) Bad night (725)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside

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  (425): we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside http://tfl.nu/0lr5
  Replies (26) Good night (5399) Bad night (697)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I sold my books for weed money!

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Finals don't start for a week...

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  (732): I sold my books for weed money! (302): Finals don't start for a week... http://tfl.nu/onx1
  Replies (19) Good night (4129) Bad night (2576)
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.

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  (229): Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment. http://tfl.nu/tuh7
  Replies (39) Good night (11967) Bad night (830)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"

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  (636): On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge" http://tfl.nu/w12y
  Replies (12) Good night (4704) Bad night (744)
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  (716): View more from New York

  she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.

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  (716): she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless. http://tfl.nu/eill
  Replies (29) Good night (6497) Bad night (1181)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed

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  (978): went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed http://tfl.nu/x5dq
  Replies (53) Good night (11536) Bad night (1433)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear

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  (931): and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear http://tfl.nu/30cm
  Replies (14) Good night (1862) Bad night (3957)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie

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  (318): He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie http://tfl.nu/gshe
  Replies (10) Good night (968) Bad night (2800)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.

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  (515): you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation. http://tfl.nu/yqu2
  Replies (8) Good night (3684) Bad night (921)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle

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  (732): we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle http://tfl.nu/y8fm
  Replies (9) Good night (3492) Bad night (746)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.

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  (630): He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me. http://tfl.nu/kvrj
  Replies (13) Good night (1396) Bad night (609)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.

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  (317): I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe. http://tfl.nu/1bo6
  Replies (2) Good night (547) Bad night (326)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.

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  (780): So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks. http://tfl.nu/pwvq
  Replies (5) Good night (1616) Bad night (301)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!

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  (907): I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st! http://tfl.nu/87p8
  Replies (2) Good night (617) Bad night (299)

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