a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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