What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
