having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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