Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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