I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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