accomplished twins. life is a go
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
