It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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