Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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