no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
