At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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