oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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