how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize