i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Randomize
