I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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