Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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