On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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