All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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