Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
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