can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
