Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize