go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
