never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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