You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
