Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
