Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
