Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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