Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
