There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
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