he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
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