I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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