Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I will pee on everything he values.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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