suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
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I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
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Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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