Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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