PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
