i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
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