i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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