I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
