i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
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