that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Randomize
