I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
