Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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