this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
