based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
We're too hungover to prance.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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